The year was 2007 and had just given up my job as a family physician and I was as LOST as lost could be.

I was bitter and confused and I didn’t know how to process all the loss and chaos of my life so I chose to numb myself instead.

I didn’t do anything outright scandalous but I nurtured a sort of secret shopping addiction.

I’m pretty sure my youngest had 12 swim suits each that year.  (I know I’m over this way of numbing myself because I live on the actual lake now and have worn the same tired swim suit for 4 years. I may need some shopping help now!)

But the thing I learned about secret addictions is that 1) You only think they’re secret.  The people you live with are smarter than you think, and 2) The things you buy only make you feel better for like 3 days or if you’re lucky 3 months, until which time you are loading them up and hauling them to Goodwill, while you fill up your online shopping cart with something you’re SURE will be answer to your woes.  It never is.  It only complicates the problem and makes you poor.

Thank the Lord, that phase of my life didn’t last long.  The craziest thing I bought was a sewing machine from QVC in the middle of the night in a rage of hormones.  In my defense, I did eventually use that machine to get through some pretty tough homeschooling days.

My point is, numbing ourselves is easier than sitting in the discomfort of our lives and facing our emotions and failures and losses and fears.

Maybe you don’t choose Land’s End, maybe it’s the hours you spend scrolling social media every day or your very unhealthy relationship with food or a pile of medications that you aren’t even sure are helping, or alcohol, or pornography, or even something seemingly as harmless as your Netflix addiction.

We are so good at running from REAL THINGS, so eager to escape to an easier version of life.  We are pros at it, actually.

But when we run and hide and numb, we are only compounding the problem and we are training our brains to be good at whatever numbing we choose.

I finally decided that I was tired of being really good at shopping or eating or mindlessly scrolling Facebook.

We also don’t realize how much we will come to loath ourselves when we numb. We hate that we never seem to have enough courage or self-discipline to make real change.  Our confidence tanks and that’s uncomfortable so we cycle back around to the thing that makes us feel better temporarily.  And the sick cycle carousel continues.

If any or all of this sounds familiar and steps on your toes, you’re not alone.

And I want us to dive deep into what is keeping us stuck and flat and unmotivated and unable to make real change.


Because you have been given a special work to do, a story to tell, a family to love, and people to serve.

Don’t let fear or apathy or self doubt keep you from doing in the world what only you can do. Yes, there will be fire and yes, there will be pain. But the alternative is to stay closed and stuck.

BUT.  If you stop hiding and running and numbing and open yourself, your mouth, your heart up—in the process, you will learn to live fully alive in your giftings, free from what has shamed you and caused you to hide yourself, free to finally love and serve the people God has put right in front of you with everything that is in you, free to be everything you were created to be.

 That’s why I’m so excited about Reclaiming Your Best Beautiful Life – a FREE online 30 day challenge for YOU to get unstuck and start living with all the fire and passion and purpose God put in that big heart of yours.  This challenge will…

  • ignite a fire in you as to who (and whose) you really are and what you were made to do
  • help you rediscover the best parts of you that have often been hiding or wounded or covered up by the stresses of life
  • help you discover practical strategies to develop your gifts & strengths, even in the midst of your busy life.
  • wake up to your unique vocation and shake the pesky bad habits that creep in when we dismiss our calling
  • nurture you toward the purpose and passion and creativity that is uniquely yours
  • give you a safe place and plenty of encouragement to daydream about the full and abundant life you were made to live.
  • discover proven and simple time management skills that will help you get more things done that matter
  • define your priorities and goals that you live life by design and not by default

My hearts desire is that by joining the 30-day challenge, you rediscover the passion, purpose and creativity in your life that has been missing or hidden and awaken to more love and compassion for others. Like the best glamping camp for adults, but better because you can do it from home with me and your favorite warm beverage.  


SIGN UP HERE!!! Just TWO more days until we start!!!

(If you’ve already signed up, let us know in the comments!!)

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