Family Tradition

by Edie Wadsworth on December 26, 2008

My family gathered for the last hurrah! last night and feasted on steak and shrimp.  It was a delightful dinner and I’m pretty sure I pulled some ab muscles laughing so hard.  I literally fell onto the floor laughing at one point…..not to be confused with me literally falling out of the bed last night…(thanks for all the concern about my possibly fractured hip, Stevie). We performed our redneck version of the 12 days of Christmas and recorded it to send to my JamieKnoxville (my beloved cousin who makes her home among the yankees of New Joisey).  She could be in debt to me for life for orchestrating that piece of musical prowess.  Loretta Lynn ain’t got nothin’ on me.   If you’re quick on the draw, you might be able to see it later today mingled into an older post.  But in the interest of protecting the last ounce of self-respect I still possess, I’m not leaving it there long.  If you do happen to view it, remember two things.  1. Most of my relatives call me ‘sister’.  2.  The favorite funeral decoration among us is the plastic phone carefully nestled among all manner of  carnations that reads “Jesus called”.  Need I elaborate?  I didn’t think so.
And for those of you who are wondering how ‘baby dog’ is doing.  He’s absolutely the most darling adorable little pooch you’ve ever seen.  And in the interest of preserving all things southern, we named him HANK.  Max sounded too much like he was from New York and wore argyle sweaters…..and had a doggy umbrella.  HANK has a certain “I drive a Ford f150 and have a rifle rack” sound.  He’s much more of a HANK.  And since our family has a really bad habit of butchering all names, I knew that within the hour, we’d be calling him Maxipad. 
Scooter (our other dog) has refused all acknowledgement of baby HANK.  He pretends not to see him at all….and when HANK comes in for a sniff, he growls.  Nice.  Way to show him some southern hospitality Scooter. Where are your doggie manners.  You should be showing him around…..showing him where to find all the dirty underwear and shoes.  You should be giving him the scoop on mealtimes and doggie treats. But no.  You refuse to welcome Baby Hank to the family. Just wait til he’s 50 pounds and giving you the cold shoulder.  You won’t like it then buddy. 
So, in 24 hours, here’s what we’ve called him

Hankie
Hankie Doodle
Hammerin’ Hank
Bocephus
Hanky Panky
Hanker
Hankerin’
Spanky Hanky
Hank-a-hank-a-burnin’ love
Tom Hanks
Hanks-a-million
Hank Jr.
The Incredible Hank
Hank You. Hankyouverymuch.
Hanks-a-lot
and songs we’ve sung to him:
“Hey, hey good lookin’ whatcha got cookin’” by Hank Williams
Hankie Doodle went to town a-riding on a pony
“They get on me wanna know Hank why do ya drank” by Hank Jr.
I’m sorry little baby dog.  Living here will at least be interesting.
Hope your Christmas was merry!

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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }

1 gina December 26, 2008 at 8:44 pm

lol. What a darling Hank is! Drat, I can’t find said video…

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2 Musings of a Homeschooling Mom December 27, 2008 at 1:24 am

Hank is adorable! It would have been a hoot to be a fly on the wall at your gathering! I have looked and looked for the video off and on today!

I got the Lutheran Book of Prayer! It looks great! Thank you for the chance to win it!

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3 edie December 27, 2008 at 6:42 am

Sorry girls for the suspense about the video. I only left it on for about an hour, but Steve has threatened to post it on YouTube. (I would be scared but I’m not altogether sure he knows how to do that). It’s funny but you probably wouldn’t ‘get’ it…..all inside jokes. Furthermore, my siblings and I (mostly I) look as if we’ve had way to much to drink, which is so not true. Maybe two glasses of wine between the four of us. It’s sad to be able to humiliate yourself that badly stone cold sober. I doubt you’d ever to be able to take me seriously again. Maybe I’ll do a giveaway where I allow a private viewing. Or maybe JamieKnoxvillle will start a blog. She’d post it for sure. And some really bad pictures of me.

She sent me a 5×7 picture for Christmas of some members of my family (including my dad who was in a top hat and a wifebeater) only to make fun of my poor orphan shoes. I think back in those days my daddy was heavy on the sauce and short on buying necessities like shoes for the children. And he really was drunk when he sang ‘Satin Sheets’ way too loud. So I guess we sorta perform in his honor. I’ve thought about writing a book about the adventures of my childhood and how I came from that to writing a post about ‘The Hidden God’. Maybe that’s why I call my blog Life in Grace…..and maybe that’s why I have so much to say! And sing!

Love to all!

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4 Ryan December 27, 2008 at 6:12 pm

Well, if you haven’t done so already, run to the library–or to my house where I have my own private stash–and get a Hank the Cowdog cd for your family’s enjoyment. We have a pretty extensive collection here if the library disappoints. Please, whatever you do, don’t settle for reading the books. You absolutely have to hear Hank tell the stories. I tell you the truth, all–adults and children alike–have laughed and laughed and laughed along with Hank and Drover and Slim and Sally Mae.

I honestly never thought you’d choose Hank for a name. I about died laughing at even the suggestion. Believe me, it will be hard for that adorable dog to fill Hank the Cowdog’s shoes–I mean paws!

This suggestion might just earn me another prize! *wink*

heheheheheheh

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5 Denise December 27, 2008 at 6:30 pm

Sorry, Ryan was home and changed my settings! :) Although he loved Hank the Cowdog as well, do not give him credit for recommending it! *wink*

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6 Kelly December 29, 2008 at 2:44 pm

I too was going to recommend going to the library and taking out all the Hank the Cowdog cds and have a good old laugh! We’ve been known to take them on road trips just to laugh! We have some but the library does too.

Go now and get them!

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7 Kelly December 29, 2008 at 2:46 pm

HAHA it never accured to me that it was my mom talking as Ryan! Too funny.

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